Why Do You Put Up With Me
by deadheadwookie27
Summary: It's a complex question with a simple answer


"Why?"

He looked up at her from his resting spot, his back against her chest, her chin atop his head. "Why what?"

"Why do you put up with me?"

He snorted. She glared at him. "I'm being serious."

"I just find it funny. Because I ask myself the same question everyday. Why do _you_ put up with_ me_?"

She smacked him in the arm. "You don't get to ask that. I asked you first. Why do you put up with me, Hiccup? I'm bossy, snide, sarcastic, I am always punching you. I answer with violence before logic. I'm headstrong. I'm cocky and competitive. I just... why do you put up with all of that?"

He sighed before sitting up. He almost heard her whimper at the loss of contact. She wasn't looking at him, but rather out over the ocean into the blinding glare of the setting sun. She looked like a valkyrie, sent down from Valhalla to protect and destroy. To take the world by storm for the good of humanity. He'd never thought she had ever looked more beautiful.

"I wish you could see what I see right now and you'd understand."

Her face turned towards him and stared, vacant and almost hurt. It looked like tears welling up in her eyes, but it could have been an illusion cast down from the red giant setting in the west.

"So you're saying you put up with me because of the way I look?" Her bottom lip trembled.

He took a moment and cupped her cheek. She nuzzled into the touch, the contact almost electrifying. He rubbed a thumb under her eye and noticed they were tears.

"No," he said. "No, not at all, Astrid. You're beautiful, gods you're the most beautiful sight to behold. Your hair is a sea of golden fire while your eyes are the oceans that quell that flame. There is nobody in this world more beautiful than you." She blushed but still looked away, so he grabbed her chin and gently raised her gaze to meet him. "But that's not why I, as you so eloquently put it, 'put up with you'."

After a moment of staring she looked away again, towards the burning ocean. "You still haven't answered my question."

"No, I haven't, because I'm still trying to find the words to answer it." He sighed. "Do you remember how we used to dodge each other during our first year of dating? How we could barely look each other in the face without going red and redirecting our attention conveniently towards the floor? Or how when we'd touch, one of us, if not both, would jump as if we were hit by scalding water? How sometimes one of us would find the courage to grab the others hand or give a kiss on the cheek?"

He could see the corners of her mouth quirking up, though she tried to fight it. So he went on.

"I was so nervous around you because even then I knew it was much more than a crush." She turned to face him. "I'd had a crush on you for years. Since before we knew what a crush was. Before I earned my nickname, Hiccup the 'Useless'. And then I did earn it, and my crush turned into something more... fathomable. No, that's not right. Infathomable is more like it. It was like tree roots that just kept growing. They went down into my heart and wound their way through it and made it their home. The crush just grew like a tree and the roots grew thicker and thicker until there was nothing left but wood.

"But I knew you never noticed me. And that was fine, I guess. Yeah, sure it hurt. It hurt a lot. But who was I to be with _you_? You're perfect in every way. And before you say anything, stop. Because in my head," he knocked twice on his skull as she was beginning to protest, "you are. We all have our faults, but that doesn't make you any less perfect. You're beautiful. You rival the goddesses in Valhalla. You swing an ax like someone from legend. You can fly Stormfly as easy as a bird takes to the sky and lets itself go with the wind. Your heart... your heart is bigger than you let on. I knew that from watching from a distance, but I never really saw it until you noticed me. Astrid, you're the biggest part of my life.

"You want to know why I was so jumpy? Why I was so afraid? I was afraid that I would do something, touch you at the wrong moment or kiss you without permission, look you in the eye and show you how much I felt, and it would dirve you away. And I don't know how I could possibly have lived with that. Knowing that I had you for a brief instant and that I had driven you away? That would have _killed_ me. I'm terrified still that I'm going to do something dumb to run you off."

She snorted.

He rasied an eyebrow at her. "And what's so funny about that? Fearing that I could lose the woman I loved over something trivial and dumb? It's the worst feeling that I wake up to each day. It's not the concerns of the village or the concerns of the dragons. It's whether or not I fucked something up and you're going to leave me."

"I'm not going to leave you. I'd never leave you," she whispered. She fiddled with her hands and he gently grabbed them.

"And why is that? Because you put up with me?"

"You know that's not true." She stared dumbly down at their hands, gripping at his fingers. "You're wonderful, Hiccup. You treat me like a real person. You see me for me. You hold doors open for me. You kiss my cheek goodnight or you hug me when I need to cry. You protect me without smothering me. You know when I need you and when I need to be alone. You just know me.

"I love the way your eyes alight with fire when you find out how something works. Or the way your tongue pokes out the side when you are drawing. I love how your hair sticks out in ridiculous angles after you've been flying Toothless without your helmet on. I don't put up with you, Hiccup. I _love_ you. There's a difference."

He smiled at her and kissed her softly. She leaned into it and tried to deepen it but he pulled away. She frowned.

"I think you just answered your own question, m'lady."

Her mouth formed and O shape and she just sat there for a moment. The sun was gone and the last light was fading but neither of them made to move. Hiccup laid his head in her lap and just looked into the sky and up at her. She absentmindedly played with his hair.

She leaned down and kissed his forehead. "Thank you."

He smiled and closed his eyes. He whistled something. For some reason it set a fire in her belly. "What is that?"

He didn't open his eyes. "It's something my mum and dad used to sing with each other. I just felt it appropriate."

"Oh."

A silence settled between them. Hiccup felt it comfortable but Astrid yearned for more. She was about to say something when he started singing.

_I'll swim and sail on savage seas_

_With ne'er a fear of drowning_

_And gladly ride the waves of life_

_If you would marry me_

_No scorching sun nor freezing cold_

_Will stop me on my journey_

_If you will promise me your heart_

_And love me for eternity. _

When he opened his eyes and saw tears shimmering in hers. He smiled up at her.

"What do you say?"

She smiled back and let out a watery laugh.

"Eternity isn't long enough you moron."

"I'll take that as a yes."


End file.
